Monday, November 7, 2011

Only God Pt 3 (& my desperate plea for prayer!)

My dear friends ~

Have you ever been a part of something that you know ONLY GOD could orchestrate?

You may remember, last month I went to my home town of Kokomo, Indiana to begin filming my testimony with RBC Ministries (recap: Part 1 & Part 2)

Being in front of a camera (and then having to talk into the camera!) is 200% out of my comfort zone.

Thankfully, with family and friends "praying down the tracks", I made it through the filming in one piece (and with minimal tears). Whew! :)

This week, the production continues...and I am once again desperate for prayer!

In addition to a number of fun scenes, I'll be sharing the hardest day of my life (and I am dreading it!).

First the fun part....

It's my husband John's turn! :)

The amazing "Day of Discovery crew" will be capturing John doing all the things that were so helpful to me while I was a grieving single mom....mowing my lawn, fixing my car, helping glue gummy worms on a board for the 100th day of school. Our son Benj is going to play "little Jake".

They'll also be filming John writing out a paycheck for me (that's how we met - John wrote the paychecks for Mars Hill Bible Church when I first joined the staff). Fun!!

However, they are also recreating the scene when I get scolded by a police officer after my cocaine overdose
. Ugh.

I'll also be in the studio reading at a lot of my testimony for the parts when they will be sharing photographs (sorry I don't know the technical terms)....the "voice over". Hopefully I'll be able to talk slowly (easier said than done for me!)

On Wednesday, we'll be recreating December 10, 1998 ~ my hardest saddest day ever. :(

That's the tragic day my fiance David was killed.

I still vividly remember being in my parent's home when I received the shocking phone call. I also recall clearing the grief counselors, church friends, and family out of the way ~ as I sat with my friend/pastor Rob Bell weeping and begging him to explain David's death.

"Why Rob, why??? Why would God allow this???" I shouted as I sobbed into my trembling hands.

I don't remember everything Rob said that horrific night, except that one day God would use this all for His purpose.

Fast forward 13 years, and we'll be re-creating this "Christmas scene" in my parents home. (A huge thank you to my parents and girls for decorating early for Christmas!)

I will be looking directly into the camera as I reflect on this painful night. I can't even imagine how I'm going to do this. It'll take a miracle.

I would be so humbled and honored if you would pray.

Upon completetion, RBC will be airing my testimony on their Day of Discovery television show. My stomach hurts just thinking about it all.


I am so out of my comfort zone that I can hardly think straight. Thankfully, one friend reminded me...."Cindy, It might be over your head, but under His feet!!!!"

(Thanks, Becky Turner. I needed that!)

Have you ever been a part of something that you know ONLY GOD could orchestrate?
How did you make it through? Were there Scripture verses that helped? I'd love to hear from you!!

I would also be grateful for any prayers you might offer on this project's behalf!! I cling to the hope that one day someone would share they were in a hard place, but then they turned on the TV (or watched a Day of Discovery DVD) with some redheaded girl, and he/she thought..."If God could get her out of that mess, there's hope for me too!" :)

I'm so thankful that God can take our insecurities, our ugliest moments, our hardest days and transform them all into something He can use for His purposes. You too?? :)

Thanks so much for stopping by *She Sparkles*! I thank God for you!!!

Sweet blessings~

P.S. I'm linking up today with Jen and friends at Soli Deo Gloria. Be sure to check out this amazing sisterhood of women! :)


Denise said...

So will be keeping you in prayer. i love that friend of yours - it's under HIS feet. :) Keep that in mind, dear!

Anonymous said...

When I am having hard times, I remember Ephesians 6 where it talks about the the getting dressed for spiritual battle.

Anonymous said...

When I am having hard times, I remember Ephesians 6 where it talks about the the getting dressed for spiritual battle.

Anonymous said...

Your story has encouraged me so much. Because of you, I have had the courage to start writing about my abusive first marriage, and God's redemption in my life. Thank you for your example...and I would be honored to pray for you.

Melissa, Multi-Tasking Mama said...

II Corinthians 9:8! I am praying for you and so excited to see how many lives God will touch through your courage to share your story!

Tiffini Kilgore said...

there is so much hope and comfort when we share our hard places..especially when God is orchestrating it..His hand upon it. I pray His hand be upon you and the whole crew. That His Holy Spirit would use the movie to speak to people who feel so broken and beyond hope and help. That their eyes and ears would be open to His grace
in Jesus name Grace to you:)

Carolyn Counterman said...

Came over from SDG. Will pray.

Keena said...

I will be praying for you!!!

Lisa Lewis Koster said...

I'm in the same boat with you Cindy. I keep thinking, "How did I end up with a school in Kenya?" This is WAY bigger than my mind can comprehend.

I look to Ephesians 3:20 - God is able to do immeasurably more than we could ask or imagine.

I've learned when I feel in over my head and have no idea what the plan is, I need to stay as close as I can to the One who does.

I never did like jumping and I hate falling, but I LOVE IT when He catches me! I'll continue to pray for you as you take this leap of faith!

Anonymous said...

God bless!

A Joyful Noise said...

Know that God is right there by your side. Remember that God will use this filming to minister to others. That is why you are doing this. May the Holy Spirit enable you to keep calm and portray all this just as He wants it done.

HopeUnbroken said...

praying for you! so enjoyed browsing your site, reading your story. what a testimony of God's faithfulness. and what a beautiful thing that He offers that same grace and hope to all of us. thank you for sharing this day and encouraging MY heart!

Jen said...

You know I'm praying, girl. And especially through tomorrow -- may there be reminders everywhere of where David is now and how he is rejoicing over the new creation that is you.

Andrea said...

I will pray for God's peace to get you through it and the assurance that God will make Himself known through you. It was amazing to read your testimony and see God's hand over your life.

Rosann said...

Cindy, your story is amazing and so god glorifying. I'm so looking forward to watching this documentary of your testimony. I think I'll even have my husband watch it with me so he can be inspired the way you inspire me. :-) Don't fret about the details. God brought you this far, He certainly has everything under control. Just trust Him.


Pamela said...

So praying...praying that what Satan meant for evil God will turn it into abundant good. I felt God's presence as I read your post and I know others will be blessed and brought to God.

Trish Maynard said...

Prov. 3: 5-7
Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.

A constant comfort for me. Something I always go back to. You are doing that, Cindy! And your heart is beautiful while you struggle with this out-of-your-comfort-zone. God bless you.

Melody said...

yes, will be praying for you, Cindy. So glad you are moving forward with this in obedience and trusting Him. You are such a special person. So glad to have met you and it's an honor to be a small part of what you're doing by praying with you. I do hope you will be posting when we and how we can see the full documentary when it's aired. Or if it can be purchased by itself.

Celia said...

Praying for you, may God's grace shine on you and give you strength and Jesus name!

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