Shovel

Have you ever wondered, “God, where are You?”

I mean, we learn as a small child in Sunday School that God is everywhere – but have you ever tilted your head back and asked the God of the Universe, “Where are You?”

I know I have...specifically after my fiance David was killed. You may be familiar with that part of my journey ~ on December 10, 1998 (5 months before our wedding date and 2 weeks before Christmas), David Timmer, my fiance and best friend, was tragically killed in a freak workplace accident.

Two weeks later, on a cloudy, dark Thursday morning, there I was, outside trying to shovel my driveway. The snow was up to my waist or higher, or so it seemed, and my little blue car wasn't going anywhere until I shoveled out a path. Jake, who was in preschool at the time, was bitter cold. (You know how it is with kids, it’s fun for like three minutes and then they’re just frozen to the core and ready to be done). As I was shoveling, I found myself asking the question- “God, where are you?”

Although actually, I think it went more like this- “OK God, where are you?! You say You’ll never leave me, but where are You now?! This is a lot of snow, God. How in the world am I supposed to shovel this all by myself? I thought I wasn't going to have to be a single mom anymore. Why did you have to take David home??!! This isn’t fair, God! This just isn’t fair! I mean, look at Jake. He's freezing ~ he has icicles hanging off of his eyelashes for crying out loud. I’m all alone, I can’t even get my car out of the driveway - God, where are You??”

I even lifted my shovel in anger and shook it at the Lord that day...

Just then, a car stopped in front of my house, and a young college kid hopped out.

“Hey lady,” he called, “this looks like a pretty big driveway for you and your son. Go on in the house and let me take care of it for you.”

Tears just poured down my face as I tried to speak the words, “Thank you, thank you, thank you”.

In the book of Deuteronomy, Moses reminds the Israelites (and us) of God’s promise to never leave us nor forsake us. The next time life circumstances cause YOU to wonder “God, where are you?..., ” ~ Go ahead and ask Him, He might be closer than you think. :)

Our Friend Margo

A few years ago, our family decided we’d have lunch at Wendy’s every Sunday after church. After a few weeks, we noticed the same woman worked the drive thru every Sunday. Now it wasn’t hard for us to pick up on this – this woman – who we now know is named Margo – had a deep smokers voice, glasses that she wore down her nose, and a front gold tooth. Not to mention she was easily confused and a little bit grumpy. OK, so maybe a lot grumpy. In fact, some of my family members (I won’t name names) started to call her Grumpy. As we’d pull up to the drive thru, they’d say, “Oh no – look who’s working today”. So I said, “What if we started to pray for her??” The family’s response was something like, “Ugghhh” – but we all agreed to pray for Margo, and pray that God would use us to show her what He is like.

Soon we started dining inside of Wendy’s each Sunday – and Margo started coming over to our booth to visit with us. We started to become friends. In fact, I can remember the first time we weren’t going to be there the next week (John and I were going away to Mackinac Island) and Margo said, “Be sure to bring me pictures”. Sure enough, the next Sunday – Mother’s Day – we went to Wendy’s for lunch so we could visit with Margo and show her our pictures.

Somehow, one Sunday, in one of our conversations, we mentioned the gym we belong to. She said, “Oh man, that one with all the pools and that huge water slide. I’ve dreamed about going swimming there.” So the next week, we brought in a week’s membership pass for Margo, and invited her to spend the day at the pool with us. What a blast that was – listening to Margo on the phone calling her sister saying, “Girlfriend, you’ll never guess where I am” – and watching her go down the water slide – screaming like a school girl – enjoying every bit of it – not a grumpy bone in sight.

You know, it was such a blessing to watch my family love on Margo – make pictures for her, laugh with her, do life with her. Our friends started coming to Wendy’s with us after church – and they would love on Margo too. My guess is that she probably started receiving more hugs at Wendy’s than she’s ever had in her whole life. We learned of some of Margo’s financial needs and asked our community of friends if they would like to bless her. Anonymously Margo started receiving gas gift cards, and grocery gift cards to help fill in that financial gap. When Margo’s car broke down and she needed a ride home – she called us – we were her new family.

One night I was having a home party, and the Spirit of God said, “invite Margo”. I’ll be honest – I wrestled with that one. "God, it's one thing to go visit her or give her a ride, but to invite her into my home, with all my friends..." I was soon convicted of my pride – and that night, at my home, one of my dear friends led Margo to the Lord and she accepted Jesus as her Lord and Savior.

It was so fun to watch God work in Margo’s life. She began attending church with us. I was asked to lead a children’s Bible club each Tuesday morning. I knew I was supposed to take the job – and someone else was to join me. You know who, right? Margo! Each Tuesday morning , my girls and I would pick up Margo, and she would go help at the Bible Club with us. Margo was making $10 an hour to learn basic Bible Truths and sing fun Bible songs. Isn’t God awesome?? I’ll never forget one of our crafts – On a sheet of paper I typed "God Loves Me" at the bottom, and then I took a photo of each of the kids, had them glue it on, and then decorate it. Margo, of course, as one of the helpers, had to make one too. She was so proud of her craft – and for the next few months – every time I went to Margo’s – there it hung proudly on her refrigerator. God loves Margo.

You know, life can be hard – and this is definitely true for Margo. Our paths don’t cross like they used to – unfortunately she was let go from Wendy’s, and has had a hard time finding steady employment ever since. I did run into her just a few months ago in the produce section at Meijers, of all places. What a blessing to be the arms and mouthpiece of God – give her a big hug - and remind her of that simple truth that God loves her so very much, and we do too.

What a gift to know that God chose our family, my small group, and my dear friend that led Margo to the Lord – that God chose us and gave us a very important job to do – in the midst of just living our everyday life - to show his dearly loved child Margo what He is like.

Let's pray: Dear God, Thank You for chosing us to reflect You…Your love, Your kindness, Your goodness…to this lost and hurting world. Please give us the eyes to see those all around us who could use a touch from You. Use us, O Lord, to advance Your Kingdom, one precious person at a time. In Jesus' Powerful Name Amen

P.S. Margo has given me permission to share her story. We love you, Margo!! :)

Infusion

I'm tired today. Exhausted. Overwhelmed with all of the school notes and phone calls to return and bills to pay. Spring hockey starts tonight, t-ball this weekend, I have physical forms to fill out (does anyone know when Jake's last TB shot was??), dance recital papers to read and sign, field trip $$ to send in, and someone just called to see if I could bring in 2 dozen cookies for tomorrow's Spring Program. I have hot lunch duty today at the high school and recess duty at the Elementary school. My hair is too long, my nail polish is chipped and I've worn these jeans one too many days in a row. My life feels cluttered and disorganized and in need of an intervention!!! Anyone else?? :)

And so I turn to God's Word (don't worry...I am reading God's Word with a venti Starbucks latte in my hand). I love Philippians 4:13 in the Amplified Bible which reads…

I have strength for all things in Christ Who empowers me – I am ready for anything and equal to anything through Him who infuses inner strength into me…

That's what I need today ~ an infusion of His inner strength into me! I picture myself in my comfy purple chair with my arms stretched out, palms facing upward, and an IV of His strength slowly dripping right into me. And I pray....

Infuse me with Your STRENGTH, O Lord..., and I think about how STRONG and MIGHTY He is...

Infuse me with Your PEACE..., and I reflect on His peace, His perfect peace, that surpasses all understanding...

Infuse me with Your PATIENCE, O God..., and I think about how patient He has been with me. May I extend that same patience to my kids (and my dog!) today!

Infuse me with Your GRACE..., and I am overwhelmed as I ponder His amazing grace. His grace that saved a wretch like me. May my life (and my thoughts and actions) reflect His grace to all who encounter me today.

Let's be honest. My circumstances have not changed. I'm still tired. My desk is still cluttered and now I'm late for recess duty! But by asking God for an infusion of His strength, peace, patience, and grace ~ I can now leave the house equipped and empowered by the One True God to face any and all circumstances that life will throw at me today. Bring it on!

What about for you?? Could you use an infusion today? An infusion of God's strength? His patience? An extra dose of His peace? May I encourage you to sit back, relax and allow God to infuse you with everything that you need to face the circumstances that come your way.

Let's pray: Dear God, Please forgive us for trying to meet the challenges of our day in our own strength. Thank You for the promise that You will equip and empower us with everything that we need for victorious living. Please infuse us with Your Strength and Grace so that we might reflect You to our friends, family, neighbors, and this lost and hurting world. We love You! In Jesus Name. Amen :)

Joy!

What a blessed week it has been! Our family is healthy and well, spring is in the air, our life is free from crisis this week, and my house is clean (for the most part!). Life is good! :)

The kick-off to the Monday night Bible Study was so much fun! The church hosting our Bible Study had pre-purchased 40 books, and we sold them all (and need to order more)! The women were excited and God's presence was definitely with us! I can't wait to see what the Lord will do in and through this group over the next 5 weeks! :)

Tuesday morning I had the opportunity to share at Sunshine Church's MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) gathering. What fun!! I knew it was going to be a great time when I first saw the room ~ it was bright and colorful and full of life! The moms were warm and caring and my heart quickly connected with theirs! I love following God and going wherever He leads (although it is almost always out of my comfort zone) and then watching Him work in powerful ways!

In my message on Tuesday morning, I shared 7 things that I believe we need as moms to not just "survive" motherhood, but to really "thrive" in the role God has called us to. Whenever I share this message, there is one part in particular that seems to especially connect with the women ~ discovering (or rediscovering) what brings us JOY.

In my own journey, there is a definite season in my mothering journey that I lost my joy. When my youngest (Sarah) was born in 2004, I felt called to leave my full-time ministry job to be a full-time mom. I knew this was what God was calling me to do, and looked forward to the challenge. However, once I was home full-time, I felt completely overwhelmed and inadequate. My kids were ages 6 months, 1, 2 and 10. (So, yes, we had 3 in diapers!). It was exhausting and lonely. Most of my friends stopped calling. (Not as much fun to "do lunch" when Cindy has 4 kids with her). I was scared to go anywhere by myself with so many kids. I watched my neighbor go blueberry picking and apple picking with her family, and then spend the day making fresh pies. Her son refused to eat my mac and cheese because it wasn't homemade. I felt like such a loser mom. Another friend was out of the house each day by 8:00 AM and would go to the park and the beach and always had fresh, healthy snacks for her kids. My kids were addicted to apple juice and ate sugary fruit snacks. I thought maybe I should go back to work ~ maybe I wasn't cut out to be a stay at home mom. I felt so alone. My counselor at the time said, "Well Cindy, it sounds like you're going through a desert experience." Really? You think?? I just paid you $10o to tell me that?! I had completely lost my joy.

And then a dear friend shared with me advice that had been passed on to her. She said, "Cindy, you need to parent within your personality". My personality?? I didn't even know who I was anymore. I was just in survival mode ~ trying to make it through the day without crying and whining (the kids, not me) and have a half-way healthy meal on the table for supper. A shower for me made the day a celebration. Parent within my personality? Who was I? What brought me joy???? I didn't even know anymore.

So I started to make a list. For me, I love people and parties and celebrations. I love loud fun music, and adventures, and doing things in "themes". I enjoy friends and serving others and most importantly, I am passionate about teaching and sharing the Good News of Jesus Christ and His great love for us all.

Soon I started to incorporate those things into my days. We had "Terrific Tuesdays" and "Wacky Wednesdays" and "Super Saturdays". We would invite friends over for a pink princess party, or have a luau in our driveway, or have scavenger hunts throughout our house to find mini pots of gold. We sang fun, loud Bible songs and went for prayer walks and put flowers on our loved ones doorsteps (and then rang the door bell and ran away)! We had a ball! :) My JOY was back! :)

Now please know, just like I'm not cut out to bake all day or can fresh vegetables, you may think I sound like a weirdo because I love colorful, plastic table cloths. Or that I love to have indoor picnics complete with plastic ants. That's ok. The key is to find out who God created YOU to be ~ and then be THAT person! Live a full life being the man/woman God created YOU to be. Discover what brings YOU joy and then parent within YOUR unique, God-given personality. Your family (and the Kingdom) desperately needs you to be YOU!!! :)

What brings you JOY? What are the things you love to do?? What family activities are most fun for you? Or if you could plan a day full of JOY ~ what would that day look like?? I'd love to hear your thoughts and ideas!!

Let's pray: Dear God, THANK YOU for creating each one of us unique and special and full of gifts to build Your Kingdom. Please remind us who You desire us to be ~ and help us to silence all of the voices and the "shoulds" around us. Thank You for the promise of LIFE to the FULL in Your Name. Thank You for the gift of JOY!! May our lives reflect the freedom and fullness and JOY of following You!! In Jesus Name. Amen :)